There it is,
the reality of my life now.
Goodness followed by intense fall-out, grief and anger.
Living in a world like this-
no one understanding, and if that isn’t enough,
pain, pain, pain
followed by no money, no home and no family.
This is the world I live in.
Overachiever as a youth,
and then as an adult.
Never finding the right place-
until right before I got sick.
Down, down, I go
waiting on the ground to meet me
as the sky falls, and I fall, down.
When will it ever stop?
I don’t want a life like this.
I am tired of holding on, believing, letting go, praying, meditating and
all that shit to make it better.
It WILL NOT be better- it JUST IS.
I pray for my old peace,
Poor but peaceful.
Maybe, not so poor this time,
Please let it be quiet, calm and …
just please make it stop
the sky is falling and I can’t find my ground
I can’t find my safe place, my hope, my dreams
The sky is falling
the sky is falling…